Manners as desire management

Abstract

Is behaving politely towards others morally valuable? Or are manners merely conventional rules which make social interaction run more smoothly without fulfilling any deeper ethical role? Even though the ‘value of manners’ is far from a mainstream topic in contemporary philosophy, there have lately been some efforts to afford manners a more important role in the moral debate. Thanks to the writings of Amy Olberding and other scholars of Chinese philosophy, Confucian approaches have also played a central part in this renewed discussion.This paper aims to contribute to this debate, but not by offering a completely new perspective on why manners might be morally relevant. Rather, my goal is to add to the discussion by focussing on the moral psychology of manners. I want to better understand what sorts of changes learning and behaving in accordance with good manners initiate in us. This may seem like a matter that is merely peripheral to the discussion. However, in my view, those wishing to defend the moral importance of manners need to provide a plausible account of such changes. Most importantly, they need to explain how good manners are not only a tool that allows us to avoid social sanctions for impolite behavior, but rather that learning good manners profoundly changes who we are.